miserable feelings

i'm not liking english tuition

first off

i planned to work 2dai

but there was tuition and there was no way my mum was gonna be able to take me...i didn't want to have to get one of the other waiters to have to come late to pick me up but my mum said she'd get my brother to take me since he can come late..

but it ends up, my brother has gone and stayed over at his girlfriend's place and is going straight there after his work [that is 7 days a week instead of 5...suspicious] and is expecting my mum to bring all his stuff...sheesh....

my aunty takes me to tuition and hangs around for 1.5 hours and then takes me home...then does the same thing on sunday for brian

which i feel really bad about since she doesn't have to but she does...takes time out of her weekend [wen she's been working the other 5 days] and..we're [me n brian] not very nice to her.....she's not a very likeable person.....

and it's stupid cos my brother had promised before to take me and brian to all of our tuition things but now that he has a 'job' he just shrugs off alll his responsibilites...is rarely home....only time i see him talkin to mum is wen complaining about dinner..'i don't eat wedding rice' 'i need some meat'...and he always says it in such a 'telling-off' way like mum has done something wrong...'i TOLD you i don't eat this and this and this...'

wen he came back from japan he was like that and then said he'd make his own food and wash his own clothes.....not anymore....he complains about the washing as well sheesh...and my mum really does seem to believe that it's her fault

the wanker

i'm angry now

i can't take a 3 day weekend

i didn't go to skool on friday since it was athletics and i really didn't wanna go...plus i felt i needed more time to do some hw...since i was gonna be working on saturday and all...and now i'm not working 2dai and i am suddenly bored out of my mind

bored...cold...hungry.....stressing about hw....and needing to call primary skool friends about my birthday since i don'thave em all on msn...hm...hold on....ok i just sent an email....hope everyone gets the message

ahhh i duno...this feeling of misery has been with me since yesterday wen i found outthat there was no way to get to work 2dai....except wen i was at jap skool

jap skool is great

only cos i have great friends ^_____^

anyway

english tuition

rmemeber i said that the secretary told me the class was all boys and one girl

well that one girl is pricilla!

which was good at the start

but then this guy walks in late and they're like hi! and cos there's no more space on out table he goes to sit behind us....and from eavesdropping i learn that she had started talkin to him last week and yeh....they obviously wanted to talk to each other....prob alone.....i was a third wheel!

i felt miserable

and awkward

ahhh miserable feelings!

i would love to say it is puberty...mood swings...but this is a bloody long moodswing! i don't want to think that maybe this is how i am and will be feeling miserable a whole lot during my lifetime

i really hate skool

all the bad feelings come from something starting at skool

it's mostly stress from all the subjects and the never ending sacs

like seriously...two weeks ago i was choc full with sacs and then i was like...yay...no more sacs for at least a while right? but then the next week art teacher drops a bomb on us and suddenly we're all rushin to get our folio's done and then we start getting all these sacs and stuff for next week.....shit! just shit shit shit....

...bad word

and exams come in a month

i'm gonna watch charmed

i really don't see wats so good abt high skool

tafe would be cool